Saturday, July 7, 2012

A Letter to My Angel Face on Your Fourth Birthday

Dear Little Angel Face,

I sit here wondering how the time has gone so quickly.  Four years old today!!!  How can it be?!  There is so much that makes you special to me, I am not even sure I can put into words all the blessings you bring.

Since you are the firstborn child, I had no idea what to expect, about anything.  One thing was very clear, you certainly were not interested in joining the world on your own.  After 40 hours of an attempt at labor, I had to have surgery for you to arrive.  We did not know if you would be a girl or a boy, but I think deep down, I knew you were a girl.  You see, my own memere passed away and I had asked her that when she got to heaven, to send us a baby and if we were to have a girl, we would name our little girl after her.  Well, my memere certainly worked her way up there quickly, because a month later, we would find out that I was pregnant.  And nine months later you were here, a baby girl that I could name after my memere!  You helped to solidify my faith: in God, in heaven, and in the afterlife.  What a special blessing!!!

Having no "baby" experience, everything was new to me.  I had never held a newborn, so I was very thankful that you were born larger than most at 9 pounds and 4 ounces.   You slept through the night early too at 5 weeks and we soon discovered that you could sleep through anything.  If we were at a party and you were tired, you slept.  It did not matter how loud it was, if you were tucked away in another room, or right in the thick of everything - you slept!  You are still a sound sleeper to this day, and since you share a room with your little sister, this too is a blessing because she can carry on and scream with the best of them.

I stayed home with you for the first eight months and then returned to work outside of the home, but only part time.  This did not bother you as much I worried that it would.  You were able to spend some special time with your nana, memere and Aunty Chris while I worked a few days a week.  You have always been very independent and outgoing, taking anyone's finger to go off and play.  It seems that to this day you adjust so easily to new people and situations.  I wish that I had that same quality.  It is definitely a strength.

Somewhere I believe that I have written down all your important firsts and hopefully I can find it.  I do remember that your first word was mama.  And that your first tooth came in at around five months.  Your first steps without any help was in early June, before your first birthday and you started walking on your own without any help at the end of August.  Just a few snippets.

My little angel face, you have a beautiful smile that lights up the room, and a great belly laugh that is just so catchy.  You also have a very kind heart, a very perceptive and sensitive heart.  I see you watch other people when they are hurt, or crying and you have a face of true concern.  Or you make a comment during a sad moment in a movie and I know that you have a heart filled with understanding.  I hope that you learn that it is ok to be sensitive, that sometimes you will feel sad or get hurt easily by a comment made.  Do not worry too much about being thin-skinned - you are much like me in that regard and I am sure we will talk about this a lot - but know that your sensitivity is a beautiful quality that not many people possess.

You are a smart little lady, very careful and methodical.  A perfectionist. You can write your own name without help, sound out words and recite the Hail Mary.  You love to do puzzles, color,  and create crafts.  You also enjoy watching movies, playing legos, dinosaurs and playing with all of your animals.  You were never very interested in playing with dolls or having tea parties.  You have begun to sing songs this past March, most notably a beautiful duet of the Alleluia from mass with your sister Hannah while driving in the car, with your adorable rendition of the song "Tomorrow" from Annie coming in at a close second.  You have told us that you want to be a zookeeper, a singer, a doctor.  You will not choose one, you want to do it all.  Go for it!

When your little sister came around just after you turned two, you loved her from the beginning.  There are so many pictures of you two cuddling and you liked helping me by getting me diapers and wipes.  You must think she is funny because you imitate her almost as much as she imitates you.  You are great at sharing with her and I love hearing your conversations.  I enjoy watching you read to her and love it when you two give hugs and kisses - just so cute and sweet - although sometimes you have a little too much fun and pull her down on top of you!

You have a silliness and a craziness all your own.  There is a certain high-pitched, piercing squeal you let out at times that shows how excited you are, or how scared.  You have learned how to climb and jump just this past year.  I greatly enjoy watching you run around, trying new things.  This year ahead will bring many new adventures I am sure.  I am looking forward to watching you grow, learn and experience so much more!  It has been a wonderful journey for me so far.  I can only imagine what is in store!

God has given me such a wonderful gift in you.  Such a blessing and a joy!  My beautiful, smart, sweet, silly, first-born baby girl!

Love you my angel face!


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